Barry's Old Warehouse, Warehouse District, Sunday Afternoon

[spin_kick_snap]

So. The island could turn her back into an ex at literally any moment. That was not a thought that was good for Kathy's peace of mind. Being an ex again, for however short a time, had not been good for Kathy's peace of mind. She hadn't been a mindless husk that had seen everything that moved as 'prey,' no, but that was cold comfort when she had spent the day eating brains.

Sharing brains with other people.

Hunting small creatures to get--

Her stomach lurched again, just thinking about it. She hadn't eat much this past week just for that reason. It felt like February all over again, when eating had been a struggle, the very act bringing up memories she didn't want to relive.

Distantly, Kathy knew she should go home, deal with the mess left in her room, deal with the mess that was her life. And she would! She just--couldn't yet. Not while she still felt like this, ten pounds of crazy in a four pound bag. She just needed to get a handle on it--was trying to get a handle on it--and when she did, she'd go home. She'd apologize for worrying everyone, she'd clean up, she'd be okay.

Soon. Just not now.

[Open]

Comments

[spin_kick_snap]

She had a slew of things she was apologizing for, from offering him brains to arguing over personhood to up and vanishing for almost a week to crying about it now. Hell, she wasn't even entirely sure what she was apologizing for, other than a nebulous 'everything' reaching all the way to becoming a zombie in the first place.

"I--I'm all right," she said, despite evidence to the contrary. "I just--"

She had no idea what she was trying to say.

[rebelseekspizza]

Dante sighed.

He walked up closer and thrust the pizza box up towards her. "Eat."

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy flinched away, from his food and tone both, but a moment later her arm, skinnier than normal, reached out to grab the box. Her hand trembled from exhaustion and it took her a few attempts to get a decent grip on the box.

"Thanks," she said, soft voice floating down to him as the box raised up.

[rebelseekspizza]

"You're welcome," Dante said. He looked at her. "Okay if I come up there, or...?"

[spin_kick_snap]

There was a long silence before Kathy's dubious "...Yeeeees?" came down.

[rebelseekspizza]

"Okay," Dante said.

And began the slow ascent up to her loft.

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy was in the furthest corner of the loft by the time he ascended, knees tight to her chest and her arms wrapped tightly around them. The pizza box was open by her side, but she hadn't actually taken a slice yet.

Her hair was wild and snarled, her pjs grubby and stained from her sojourn outside. The only thing keeping her from being absolutely filthy was the shower Barry had installed in the warehouse. Kathy had spent hours under the water, the temperature turned up higher than was comfortable, leaving her skin stinging and red. And she'd sit there, blank-eyed, until the hot water finally ran out, and she'd be left with a frigid blast that left her shivering and running for her blankets.

[rebelseekspizza]

Dante sighed, taking in the scene. "You gotta eat, Kat," he said.

He took a few more steps, until he was close enough - could sit down opposite her and push the pizza box a little closer.

[spin_kick_snap]

"I know," she said, trying not to flinch away again. "I'm trying. It's just--" She waved her hands around, trying to find words. "Hard. Again."

[rebelseekspizza]

"I know," Dante echoed gently. "But this is just dough and veggies, okay?"

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy nodded, managing to pick up a slice. It was cold, which made it less appealing, but even piping hot from the oven, she would have grimaced at it.

Or maybe she was making that face at her hands, which weren't doing so hot with the whole steadiness thing. She needed to find healthier ways to cope with trauma than subsistence eating.

She took a small bite. Chewed. Swallowed. Her brain reminded her of what was waiting for her in her room and her gorge rose. She fought it back. A long pause to see which would win and then she was taking another small bite.

This could be awhile, Dante. Sorry.

[rebelseekspizza]

That was fine. Dante was... well, he wasn't happy, but he could sit here for a while and watch her eat.

So he did. In silence.

[spin_kick_snap]

The silence was awkward and it made Kathy's throat close up even tighter. She forced herself to swallow yet another bite and ventured, "..."

Good job utterly failing at this, Kathy. Add it to the list.

"Sometimes I really fucking hate this place."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Yeah, that goes for both of us," Dante said, mouth quirking, but not with any great joy. "That fucking sucked, I'm sorry."

[spin_kick_snap]

"You got it from all sides," Kathy said, finishing off the last bite of her crust. She snuck a look at him, decided one piece probably wasn't going to cut it and carefully listed another one. "Me and Anders both, saying fucked up shit to you."

[rebelseekspizza]

"It's fine," Dante said dismissively. "I'm not the one that got turned right back into a zombie."

Zombie-Kathy's shit about being monsters had stung. He was probably gonna carry it in the back of his mind for a bit. But it wasn't this Kathy's fault.

[spin_kick_snap]

This Kathy was going to carry the guilt of that around for awhile anyway. But then, she was used to feeling guilty for what she'd done as a zombie.

"I feel self-indulgent," she murmured. "Like, it was just a stupid Fandom thing like we've dealt with a million times. I shouldn't be freaking out like this."

[rebelseekspizza]

"You're not self-indulgent, Kat," Dante said quietly. "You just got thrown back into the worst months of your life."

[spin_kick_snap]

"And I don't know if it's going to happen again!" Kathy burst out. "It did it once, it can do so at any time!"

That wasn't exactly how the island worked, she knew, but the threat was there now, hanging over her head like the sword of Damocles.

[rebelseekspizza]

"If it does at all, it's gonna be a year from now, and we'll be ready this time," Dante said. "But I get that's not much of a relief."

Fuck, that was how he'd lived for years.

[spin_kick_snap]

"Kids are usually a prom thing, but sometimes they show up other times," Kathy pointed out softly. She'd done a lot of worrying obsessing thinking about this over the past few days. "Same with pollen and Valentine's Day. There's no schedule for turning into kids, or swapping sexes, or animals."

So if it happened again, it would probably be around Halloween, but that wasn't a guarantee. Hell, it might never happen again, but the possibility would still be there to haunt her.

"Next Halloween I wanna be anywhere but here. I'd rather fight demons naked than do that again."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Next Halloween I'll take you home," Dante promised, leaning forward. "We'll just pig out on pizza and maybe help Kat out."

[spin_kick_snap]

"Watch shitty horror movies where you can see the rubber masks," Kathy agreed. "Then once it gets dark, I can show you real horror flicks, not crappy American ones."

Yes. This was good. This was something she could cling to that didn't smack of responsibilities or promises or anything serious.

[rebelseekspizza]

"And we'll get a shitload of popcorn and see how badly we can scare the shit out of Anders," Dante said, nodding along. "It'd be great."

[spin_kick_snap]

"Take turns getting up to grab something from the other room, then come back in and grab him?" Kathy asked. "Bet I can make him yell louder."

The second slice of pizza was going down easier than the first.