Barry's Old Warehouse, Warehouse District, Sunday Afternoon

[spin_kick_snap]

So. The island could turn her back into an ex at literally any moment. That was not a thought that was good for Kathy's peace of mind. Being an ex again, for however short a time, had not been good for Kathy's peace of mind. She hadn't been a mindless husk that had seen everything that moved as 'prey,' no, but that was cold comfort when she had spent the day eating brains.

Sharing brains with other people.

Hunting small creatures to get--

Her stomach lurched again, just thinking about it. She hadn't eat much this past week just for that reason. It felt like February all over again, when eating had been a struggle, the very act bringing up memories she didn't want to relive.

Distantly, Kathy knew she should go home, deal with the mess left in her room, deal with the mess that was her life. And she would! She just--couldn't yet. Not while she still felt like this, ten pounds of crazy in a four pound bag. She just needed to get a handle on it--was trying to get a handle on it--and when she did, she'd go home. She'd apologize for worrying everyone, she'd clean up, she'd be okay.

Soon. Just not now.

[Open]

Comments

[rebelseekspizza]

"Happened before it too," Dante said idly.

He hadn't really ever thought about it in that light.

[spin_kick_snap]

What light had he been thinking of it in?

"Really?" Kathy asked. "When?" And then she winced. "Was it after the whole 'I love you' debacle?"

[rebelseekspizza]

Not him being Ringo's main friend?

"Yeaah, that was the first time," Dante said, snorting. "I had to pick her up, dust her off, and let her cry on me for a night."

[spin_kick_snap]

Dante really underestimated the impact he had on people, didn't he?

"Oh lord," Kathy groaned, dropping her forehead onto his chest. "That whole thing was so incredibly awkward."

And had reaffirmed Kathy's own commitment to never saying that to someone who couldn't say it back.

[rebelseekspizza]

Yeah. Pretty much, yeah.

"Still don't know why she decided to do it, besides that Ringo's kind of nuts," Dante volunteered. "And won't stand down when she sees a stupid idea coming."

[spin_kick_snap]

"She wanted to be honest," Kathy said. "Didn't want to hide something like that from me, I guess."

Kathy was okay with that kind of dishonesty, actually. There had been nothing she could do other than say an awkward 'thank you and I'm sorry?'

Seriously. Never doing that herself.

[rebelseekspizza]

"Nah, it wasn't about you," Dante said quietly. "If she'd been worried about it affecting you guys or whatever? Might've been slightly less stupid. But she just wanted to say it, and fuck everybody else."

[spin_kick_snap]

"Wait, really?" Kathy asked, blinking at him wide-eyed. "I thought--"

[rebelseekspizza]

"Thought what?" Dante said. "That she wanted to spare you like, another year of you guys not being fucking awkward at each other?"

[spin_kick_snap]

"...Kinda?"

And it had just, like, horrifically backfired?

"That she just wanted to be super-honest or something?"

[rebelseekspizza]

"Nah, from what I could tell, she just wanted the satisfaction of saying it," Dante said.

[spin_kick_snap]

"...Oh." Beat. "That's kinda fucked up!"

[rebelseekspizza]

"No shit," Dante said, snorting. "I like Ringo, but fuck, she loves making problems, shoving them in somebody else's lap, and then getting fucking mad or upset when the other person doesn't fix 'em."

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy frowned, uncertain how to feel about this. It had been years ago, so it felt stupid to get upset over it all over again, but it was still a little galling to learn this.

"Dammit, I've felt guilty about this! For years!"

[rebelseekspizza]

"Why?"

Dante stared at her.

[spin_kick_snap]

"...Because I hurt her feelings?"

Was that weird?

[rebelseekspizza]

"Kathy, she knew you were gonna say no."

[spin_kick_snap]

"Right, but..." Kathy stalled, unable to figure out what came after the 'but.' "She just looked so wrecked up there afterwards. And I hated hurting her feelings. I felt like maybe I hadn't tried hard enough or something."

[rebelseekspizza]

"You weren't gonna fall for her," Dante said simply. "Even if you hadn't been straight. There was nothing you could do, and she knew that."

[spin_kick_snap]

"I know it's just...she was hurting and that hurt was because of me," Kathy said. "Even if it's not logical, I just felt bad. I don't like being the reason my friends are in pain, even if it's not something that was my fault to begin with."

Making Kathy feel guilty was a pretty easy proposition, let's be real.

[rebelseekspizza]

"She was hurting 'cause she was in love with you and she couldn't deal with it on her own," Dante said, sighing. "Weight of the world's not yours, Kat."

[spin_kick_snap]

She was making him sigh a lot with this conversation. (And kind of felt bad about that, too.)

"Yeah, that's another one for you to teach me how to accept," she said with a laugh devoid of actual amusement. "You're right. I know you're right. But I keep thinking...I dunno. Maybe if I work just a little bit harder, I can make everyone I care about happy."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Can't."

For once, it was Dante who put his head down on her shoulder, and stayed there. "But you're doing pretty good with Anders." Beat. "And me, I guess."

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy pressed her cheek against his hair and closed her eyes. "Just you guess, huh? I'll have to up my rock guitar and strawberry dessert game."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Figure you'll get that down sometime," Dante said, sounding equal parts joking and content, his own eyes closed too.