Apartment Above Luke's, Tuesday

[spin_kick_snap]

It was Tuesday. Kathy knew she was supposed to be getting to work sometime this afternoon, doing stock or cleaning or trying to find people to come work for her or any number of countless, pointless projects. She had a routine and routines were important, at least according to what little poking around she'd done on the computer for Helpful tips when you're a basket case. But she couldn't summon the energy to get up off the couch today. Hell, getting out of bed had been a titanic struggle and the only reason she'd managed a shower at all was because she'd sat on the floor of the tub and just let the water run over her for most of it.

It sucked. She'd really thought she was doing better. She'd been okay for a few days there, genuinely happy and smiling and laughing. The kids had been great distractions while they'd been there, but they were gone now, leaving a hole in Kathy's heart and the promise of a future that seemed further away than ever, today. From 'okay' to 'utter distaster' in just twelve hours, only this time she didn't even have the outlet of fighting in Baltimore to try to channel some of this bullshit into. All she had was Hulu and about a million seasons of Hades' Kitchen to get through while she tried very hard not to think about what Saturday had been or her alternate reality daughter with her dead sister's name.

"You're never going to impress him with that mess," she informed the TV from inside her comfy cocoon of blanket. "It looks like you threw up on a plate. Way to just hand the victory to the blue team, ladies, jeez."

[Open, though I'll be off to bed soon.]

Comments

[spin_kick_snap]

"Don't do that," Kathy said, more sharply than she meant. "Don't diminish yourself and what hurts you." God knows, it was a serious case of 'do as I say, not as I do' but whatever. Ringo needed to hear it. "That's how Crazy Apple comes out. You tell yourself that's it's nothing, that there are more important things to worry about, that you're being stupid for no reason, and suddenly you're drowning in feelings you can't work through and she's there to offer you some quiet. Don't."

[soniaroadsqueen]

Her head came up in surprise, and Ringo blinked a couple of times.

"B-but, other people have a lot more to deal with than I do." Her fingers tightened around Kathy's hand. "You have more to deal with."

Which wasn't the point at all, Ringo.

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy nodded solemnly. Then leaned over and thumped Ringo in the ear. Pretty hard.

[soniaroadsqueen]

Ringo flinched in surprise.

"Ouch!"

Not that it had actually hurt very much, at least not compared to an AirTrek spill, but she rubbed at her ear. "What was that for?"

As if it weren't somehow super-obvious.

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy pointed to the last vestiges of her road rash. "And that hurt a whole lot," she said. "Does the fact that it hurt more than your thump mean that your thump somehow didn't hurt at all?"

She was ready to give Ringo another one if she said yes.

[soniaroadsqueen]

"Noooo," Ringo sighed, just a little reluctantly.

She was silent for a couple of seconds.

"But if we both went to the doctor, you'd be first in line." Clearly deserving of more attention. Clearly.

[spin_kick_snap]

"I would," Kathy agreed. "But that doesn't mean you wouldn't be seen at all."

[soniaroadsqueen]

Ringo nodded, still looking a little reluctant. But Kathy was right.

She was tempted to point out that that meant she should stay out of the doctor's way while Kathy got dealt with, but she didn't think that'd fly.

[spin_kick_snap]

Did Ringo want to get thumped again? Cause Kathy could thump her again. While bringing up the point that most practices had several doctors working for them which meant that could probably be seen at the same time.

Which would also stretch the metaphor to the breaking point, but whatever. More thumps.

"How you doing now?" she asked.

[soniaroadsqueen]

No, thank you though. Ringo had had enough thumping. For now.

But don't worry, she was sure to deserve more soon enough.

"A little bit better?" she allowed hesitantly. "Sleeping a little better, but still having nightmares." Her fingers clenched and unclenched nervously, as if she wasn't sure what to do with them.

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy nodded. She knew that feeling well. "I don't have any advice for that," she said softly. "I wish I did. Sorry. I just tend to nap a lot during the day to make up for them."

[soniaroadsqueen]

"I hadn't thought of that. Felt like it was important to, I don't know, keep moving."

Ringo shook her head, then shrugged a bit helplessly.

"What-- What about you?"

[spin_kick_snap]

"Better than I was," Kathy said softly. "But I still feel like I'm drowning, more often than not. Before, I knew where I was going and how to get there. My whole life was this perfectly plotted itinerary. Now, I don't have any of that. I'm lost and I don't even know where I want to go to start figuring out how to get there."

[soniaroadsqueen]

Ringo remembered that. Kathy had always seemed to have everything so together. To be so sure of herself.

"Do you, um, do you at least have some ideas of where you want to be?" Ringo ventured hesitantly, not even sure it was the right question to ask

[spin_kick_snap]

"Not a clue," Kathy said. "I don't even know if I want to go to college anymore. I know there's no way in hell I can be a doctor now, even if I were a hundred percent certain that was what I'd really wanted to do and not just some long-term conditioning by my parents."

[soniaroadsqueen]

"Do you, you know, feel like you have to figure it all out now?"

Ringo looked over at Kathy and offered an awkward smile. "I mean, I've never really had it as together, and still don't really know what I want to do, but, um, I think that might be okay?" She had time to figure things out, right?

[spin_kick_snap]

"It would be nice to have some kind of direction," Kathy said. "Right now I'm just drifting. I don't know what I want so I don't know where to go. And drifting lets me brood and think of all the ways I screw up."

She didn't need to figure everything out, but she needed something.

[soniaroadsqueen]

"It doesn't have to be a forever thing, does it?" Ringo cast around for something to offer Kathy. Some sort of help she could give.

"Maybe. Maybe just a project to work on for the next few months?"

It would be a start, at least.

[spin_kick_snap]

"That's kinda why I have the store now," Kathy said. "Something to focus on while I try to figure out what the heck I'm going to do with myself."

[soniaroadsqueen]

"You have a store?"

Ringo really hadn't been paying nearly enough attention.

Not that it was the kind of store she'd wander into on her own, anyway.

[spin_kick_snap]

"Errr...yes?" Kathy said, wincing. "The adult store in town?"

[soniaroadsqueen]

Ringo blinked.

For a couple of seconds.

"The adult store?" she repeated. Not because she didn't know what that meant, but because the words still hadn't totally processed through her brain.

[spin_kick_snap]

"Dite's Decadent Delights," Kathy said, feeling really awkward about that. "I picked up the keys when the last manager stormed out and..." She spread her hands. "Now I have a store?"

[soniaroadsqueen]

"Right. Um. That's."

"Congratulations?"

Was that the right sentiment?

[spin_kick_snap]

Honestly? Kathy wasn't even sure and it was her damn store!

"Thanks?" she said, shrugging to show she was just as confused. "It's something to do, anyway? And I like the whole 'running a store' thing, so...who knows? Maybe I'll live out my life as the owner of the sex toy shop on a multi-dimensional island. There are worse fates."