Apartment Above Luke's, Tuesday

[spin_kick_snap]

It was Tuesday. Kathy knew she was supposed to be getting to work sometime this afternoon, doing stock or cleaning or trying to find people to come work for her or any number of countless, pointless projects. She had a routine and routines were important, at least according to what little poking around she'd done on the computer for Helpful tips when you're a basket case. But she couldn't summon the energy to get up off the couch today. Hell, getting out of bed had been a titanic struggle and the only reason she'd managed a shower at all was because she'd sat on the floor of the tub and just let the water run over her for most of it.

It sucked. She'd really thought she was doing better. She'd been okay for a few days there, genuinely happy and smiling and laughing. The kids had been great distractions while they'd been there, but they were gone now, leaving a hole in Kathy's heart and the promise of a future that seemed further away than ever, today. From 'okay' to 'utter distaster' in just twelve hours, only this time she didn't even have the outlet of fighting in Baltimore to try to channel some of this bullshit into. All she had was Hulu and about a million seasons of Hades' Kitchen to get through while she tried very hard not to think about what Saturday had been or her alternate reality daughter with her dead sister's name.

"You're never going to impress him with that mess," she informed the TV from inside her comfy cocoon of blanket. "It looks like you threw up on a plate. Way to just hand the victory to the blue team, ladies, jeez."

[Open, though I'll be off to bed soon.]

Comments

[spin_kick_snap]

"Better than I was," Kathy said softly. "But I still feel like I'm drowning, more often than not. Before, I knew where I was going and how to get there. My whole life was this perfectly plotted itinerary. Now, I don't have any of that. I'm lost and I don't even know where I want to go to start figuring out how to get there."

[soniaroadsqueen]

Ringo remembered that. Kathy had always seemed to have everything so together. To be so sure of herself.

"Do you, um, do you at least have some ideas of where you want to be?" Ringo ventured hesitantly, not even sure it was the right question to ask

[spin_kick_snap]

"Not a clue," Kathy said. "I don't even know if I want to go to college anymore. I know there's no way in hell I can be a doctor now, even if I were a hundred percent certain that was what I'd really wanted to do and not just some long-term conditioning by my parents."

[soniaroadsqueen]

"Do you, you know, feel like you have to figure it all out now?"

Ringo looked over at Kathy and offered an awkward smile. "I mean, I've never really had it as together, and still don't really know what I want to do, but, um, I think that might be okay?" She had time to figure things out, right?

[spin_kick_snap]

"It would be nice to have some kind of direction," Kathy said. "Right now I'm just drifting. I don't know what I want so I don't know where to go. And drifting lets me brood and think of all the ways I screw up."

She didn't need to figure everything out, but she needed something.

[soniaroadsqueen]

"It doesn't have to be a forever thing, does it?" Ringo cast around for something to offer Kathy. Some sort of help she could give.

"Maybe. Maybe just a project to work on for the next few months?"

It would be a start, at least.

[spin_kick_snap]

"That's kinda why I have the store now," Kathy said. "Something to focus on while I try to figure out what the heck I'm going to do with myself."

[soniaroadsqueen]

"You have a store?"

Ringo really hadn't been paying nearly enough attention.

Not that it was the kind of store she'd wander into on her own, anyway.

[spin_kick_snap]

"Errr...yes?" Kathy said, wincing. "The adult store in town?"

[soniaroadsqueen]

Ringo blinked.

For a couple of seconds.

"The adult store?" she repeated. Not because she didn't know what that meant, but because the words still hadn't totally processed through her brain.

[spin_kick_snap]

"Dite's Decadent Delights," Kathy said, feeling really awkward about that. "I picked up the keys when the last manager stormed out and..." She spread her hands. "Now I have a store?"

[soniaroadsqueen]

"Right. Um. That's."

"Congratulations?"

Was that the right sentiment?

[spin_kick_snap]

Honestly? Kathy wasn't even sure and it was her damn store!

"Thanks?" she said, shrugging to show she was just as confused. "It's something to do, anyway? And I like the whole 'running a store' thing, so...who knows? Maybe I'll live out my life as the owner of the sex toy shop on a multi-dimensional island. There are worse fates."

[soniaroadsqueen]

Ringo considered that. "But it doesn't, I don't know, doesn't sound like a project? Something to, um, be focused on?" And it sounded like that was something Kathy needed.

"Unless, um, you've got big plans or something?"

[spin_kick_snap]

"Well, I've got some," Kathy said, perking up a little. "I've got a few ideas to meld sex education and access, you know? So that everyone always has what they need and understand how to use it!"

[soniaroadsqueen]

That little spark in Kathy's eye had Ringo sitting up a bit straighter herself. "Yeah? Like, um, what are you thinking?"

She was trying not to blush too hard at the subject matter. It was more important to see if she could keep Kathy engaged than worry about being embarrassed after all, right?

[spin_kick_snap]

"Monthly subscription boxes, like LootCrate and that kind of thing," Kathy said. "With different kinds of safer sex options that people could ask for and little toys and things that all come with bits of advice or educational fliers, so it'd be a little bit of education along with something fun and new to encourage people to experiment to find out what they like!"

[soniaroadsqueen]

"That sounds. Um. Cool?"

She meant awkward. Very, very awkward.

Which her blush was almost certainly giving away.

[spin_kick_snap]

"You are a terrible liar," Kathy said, before cracking up.

[soniaroadsqueen]

Ringo just blushed even more. "Am not!" she objected. Unconvincingly. "It-it does sound cool." The little stutter and the way her voice trailed off at the end probably didn't make her sound any more convincing, either.

[spin_kick_snap]

"Really?" Kathy asked. "Okay, I'll bite. What about it sounds cool to you, Ringo?"

That was right, Ringo. Go for details.

[soniaroadsqueen]

"Um." Dang it, Kathy!

"The, um, helping people part?"

Kathy had said something about helping people, right? Ringo had kind of only half paid attention once she realized what they were talking about.

[spin_kick_snap]

"Do go on," Kathy said, her expression saying she one hundred percent was not buying your bullshit, Ringo.

[soniaroadsqueen]

Ringo ducked her head, blushing even more furiously.

"Shut up," she muttered sullenly.

[spin_kick_snap]

"That's what I thought," Kathy said, settling back on the couch and looking pleased with herself.