Baltimore, Sunday Night

[spin_kick_snap]

It had been another bad day. The worst part was, there had been nothing that had made it a bad day. It wasn't like there was rhyme or reason for it, but for some reason as the sun went down and the lights came on over the water, Kathy been struck anew by grief, her breath thick in her throat, her eyes burning with tears. Maybe the lights had reminded her of LA. Or maybe they'd reminded her of happier, easier times, when everything was good. More than good. Perfect. She'd known what she was doing and why--everything had made sense. She'd had a plan and every step she'd taken had moved her closer to her goals.

Now she had no plan, no goals other than 'make it through the day.' Some days, she felt good, like she was making progress, uncovering bits and pieces of herself that she'd thought she'd lost, trying to fit them into the person she was now like shards of a broken mirror. Other days, like today, she felt like she was drowning and every breath was a struggle around the thick weight of grief and regret and pain that sat on her chest like a creature out of myth. Most days were somewhere in-between, an odd muted gray as she fumbled her way, uncertain whether she was moving forward or backwards or even off to the side.

Like she did so many nights, she made her way to Baltimore. This time, she found herself on a rooftop somewhere, staring down at the city. She didn't think she'd even stood on this particular building as Banzai before, but still the vantage point and the angles were so familiar that the ache she felt sharpened to the point of true pain. But the tears stayed where they were, locked away, and instead she just sat, staring at the city, at the life, she'd once called hers and waited for it to pass.

It would pass, right?



[For one and up early for SP]

Comments

[rebelseekspizza]

"That's where we got Blondie, in Baltimore," Dante said idly. "Luke's was the last one?"

[spin_kick_snap]

"...Blondie?" Kathy asked, confused. "You got another cat? Is Lachlan all right?"

She'd missed that entirely.

"Yeah. Well, technically, Luke's was the first one. Furnado was the last. Then the manager at Dite's quit and that seemed almost providential. There wasn't anything to freak me out in there, so..."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Just a whole lot of dicks," Dante agreed.

He swiped the first shot he got when the waiter got back. "And Lachlan's fine. We just found out about the cafe, and you know Anders..." He shrugged. "So now we got two cats."

[spin_kick_snap]

"There was a zombie dick, but it was just green with weird ridges to look like scabs or something." Kathy said, nudging one of hers in his direction, too. Hey, she owed him one. "I tossed it, but it didn't make me hyperventilate in a corner or anything."

She gave him a small smile. "Maybe when I get over all this, you can show me where that cafe is. It sounds like somewhere I'd like to visit."

[rebelseekspizza]

"It's fun. You get a drink and an hour with the cats," Dante said. "Just don't let Anders name any of them. He haggled me down to 'Messere Blondie Fuzzybutt'."

He left her shot where it was. She needed it more.

[spin_kick_snap]

"I wonder how Raven would feel about a pet," Kathy mused. "I've never had one. Always wanted a dog, though. But a cat would be cool, too."

[rebelseekspizza]

"I can sorta see you with one of those cats that's like, all fur?" Dante said. "Like a walking pile of love."

And who didn't look like anything you could eat.

[spin_kick_snap]

Just ask Eliot about the few seconds when Kathy had first seen Val's underbelly.

"That would be awesome," Kathy admitted. "Or one of the little squishy-faced kitties. And I know I should go to a shelter and adopt, like, an old cat or something because they're harder to place, but part of me just wants a tiny little squeaky kitten."

[rebelseekspizza]

"When you're up for it, we'll take you to the cafe, you can pick out what you like," Dante said thoughtfully. "They got a mix. Blondie's this tiny almost-kitten, but there were old cats too."

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"That would be really awesome," Kathy said, a small, happy smile playing over her face for a moment, banishing the tired look everywhere except around her eyes. "So long as we can keep Anders from trying to name it. How's the stray kitty in town? You still visit him?"

[rebelseekspizza]

"Sometimes, but I think he's had kittens or something," Dante said wryly. "Doesn't come by nearly as much."

[spin_kick_snap]

"Uh-oh, the feral tom's settling down," Kathy said with a fair dose of irony. "Whatever's going to happen next?"

[rebelseekspizza]

"I figure by summer he'll be back to banging other cats across the island," Dante said, shrugging. "'Cause cat."

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"Do cats not tend to stay together after they've mated?" Kathy asked. "I thought they, like, had family groups or something. You know, in the wild. Like prides and stuff."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Pretty sure dude cats just roam around humping the ladies," Dante said. "It's not all that Mooby."

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"Huh," Kathy said. "I guess that makes sense for the whole 'tomcatting around' thing. I just thought that it was for juvenile cats before they settled down. I...don't really know a whole lot about cats."

She would by the weekend though. This was an excuse to do research!

"I guess I always thought of them as little lions, at least the feral ones."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Nah, regular cats are nothing like lions, feral or not," Dante said, snorting quietly. "I know that much. Even Lachlan and Blondie just kinda tolerate each other."

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Kathy shrugged. "Never had one. Never even really got to see one outside of pet stores or alley cats before I got here. Mom wasn't a fan and my Korean cousins had a kitty, but they never brought it to Halmeoni's house and we never visited theirs."

[rebelseekspizza]

"I never really saw the point of keeping 'em indoors," Dante said. "Cat's gotta cat. But I dunno, Blondie was cute."

And got to go wherever she wanted.

[spin_kick_snap]

"Having outdoor cats in a city scares me," Kathy said. "There are so many things that could hurt them. People, cars, other animals. I'd rather mine stay inside where they're safe. It's different out here, where things are safer."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Sucks if your pet gets hurt, but it's not really fair to lock it up all the time either," Dante pointed out, and picked up another one of his shots.

[spin_kick_snap]

"At some point, I'd love to talk to you about the line between personal freedom and safety," Kathy said, snagging her next shot. "But the world is blurring around the edges enough to know that that's probably not the best idea right now. And that my nachos were a brilliant one."

Which...Speak of her nachos and they'd appear, apparently. The server plunked them down on the table between them and paused to see if they wanted any more drinks.

[rebelseekspizza]

"Another round of all of this before she starts sobering up again," Dante said, waving at their drinks.

Then he leaned over to steal a nacho. "Fine. So that one's off the list too. Got any topics left?"

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy was digging into her nachos too enthusiastically to respond for a few moments. Vegetarian, but with plenty of cheese and hot peppers to make up for it. "Oh, like you were pining over the chance to debate that with me," she said, taking a moment to breathe. She nudged the plate towards him in invitation and the world was already a little steadier. "I'm thinking about getting another tattoo."

[rebelseekspizza]

"What kind?" Dante asked.

His eyebrows had shot up some during the past minute or so, but he wasn't so changed that he'd pass up on free nachos.

He crammed a bunch in his mouth.