Apartment Above Luke's, Thursday Afternoon

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy was sitting crosslegged in her living room, surrounded by a truly staggering number of anatomically-shaped lollipops, hard candies, and other confections. It turned out that the company that had supplied Dite's with chocolates and candy had gone out of business and multiple other companies had sent samples to the store in hopes of scoring the contract. Kathy...wasn't sure what it said about the store or the island that it was considered a lucrative enough market for a number of stores to go to this much trouble.

But, she was determined to be a good manager and if that meant spending the afternoon trying a ridiculous amount of sexy candy to decide which she liked best, well, she was up to the task. As long as she took breaks for real food every few hours, she should be okay, right? And she had a pen and paper to record her observations (and had come up with several criteria to judge them on), making this all legit and aboveboard and not just an excuse to gorge out on penis-shaped candy all day.

So far, she'd noticed that the sour gummy boobs made the cut on her lip burn and the mold for one of the companies tended to make their chocolates look more like melted candles than anything sexy. Oh, and another company used cheap chocolate that tended to flake off which was just NOT attractive in something meant to simulate body parts. It was this kind of attention to detail that separated the good managers from the mediocre, see?

[Open! But probably slow as I'm still in training, so who knows what my schedule will be when this finally posts. Link to Anders' thread.]

Comments

[rebelseekspizza]

"I don't remember, but now I gotta know," Dante said.

When you were caught in it, no way to go but forward.

[spin_kick_snap]

If your name was Dante Sparda, maybe.

"I was terrible with my fingers," Kathy said with a rueful grin. "Still am by myself. But one day after gymnastics I was taking a bath and saw all the water rushing out of the faucet and, well...had an idea. An idea that worked. A little too well, actually."

[rebelseekspizza]

"So you went for a round of some bathroom gymnastics?"

[spin_kick_snap]

"And got a gold," Kathy said. "Came so hard I ended up going under the water and hitting the back of my head on the tub. I think I had a bump the next day, even. Not that that was enough to convince me to, uhh, find another way, so..." She was laughing again, though with her hands over her face. "Kept that up for a few months until my dad got the water bill and freaked out over how much it had grown. Not that I copped to anything at all ever."

[rebelseekspizza]

Dante let out a burst of laughter. "Kathy Li came and the water bill went," he said. "Suits the fucker right."

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy's laughter trailed off. Her dad had been a fucker, right enough, but his loss was still a raw wound. She busied herself with the candy again, looking for strawberry ones to donate to the cause of 'keeping Dante in sweets.'

"Had to kick it down a notch," she said, shaking her head. "I guess even back then I was close to insatiable."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Running a million orgasms an hour."

Dante's eyes were questioning; had he said aomerhing wrong? "Running a sex shop seems about right now."

[spin_kick_snap]

"Those that can, do. Those that can't...run a sex shop apparently," Kathy said, flicking a packet of 'Strawberry Nubs' at him. They were supposed to be tiny-strawberry scented clits or something, but she was pretty sure they were just weird little candy lumps someone had saved with good marketing. "Don't worry, though. I'm going to nerd it up a ton."

[rebelseekspizza]

Dante caught the bag and ripped it open.

... Yeah, he was not able to figure out what the fuck these were. "Oh fuck, not math or social justice or whatever in the sex shop."

[spin_kick_snap]

"We made math sexy once, remember?" Kathy asked, unwrapping a cherry dickpop for herself. Oooh, a little sour, she liked it! "Orgy homework or something. How many gallons of lube and number of condoms and all that stuff?"

[rebelseekspizza]

Dante tilted his head at her with the cherry dickpop.

... still not quite feeling it. But the memories were nice.

"How much lube would the island use in a week?"

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy had given a half-thought to eating it suggestively but--no. Not quite that confident yet. Not even to tease and certainly not to entice.

"Oh, god, I don't even know that," she said, shaking her head. "I'd have to have a better idea of who was having sex and how much and there are just some things I don't want to know. I still think of most of the adults as my teachers."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Listen to radio for five seconds and you know who's fucking who whether you like it or not," Dante retorted.

[spin_kick_snap]

"I don't need to figure out how much lube they use while doing it," Kathy retorted, shoulders relaxing again after they'd tensed with the whole 'dad' thing.

[rebelseekspizza]

"You're gonna find out," Dante pointed out easily. "You're like, the only place to buy lube in town."

[spin_kick_snap]

"Yes, but as soon as they leave, I'm going to immediately stop thinking about it." Which...actually sparked an idea.

"You know what?" she asked, looking excited and reaching for her notebook. "I should start a monthly subscription service. Like, for X amount of dollars a month, I'll just send people a supply of safer sex items--condoms, lube, dental dams, all that stuff. They get a discreet delivery of supplies guaranteed every month all without having to come in! Dante, you're a genius!"

[rebelseekspizza]

"... I don't know about that, but sign me up," Dante said.

After a beat to process that weird shift, there.

[spin_kick_snap]

It made sense in her head! Sometimes her brain linked things and skipped over the interim steps to get there. Thought-tesseracting!

"Right? You could get all the basic sex supplies you need, but privately and without even needing to come in! All the supplies you need, delivered right to your door!"

[rebelseekspizza]

"Probably gonna have to ask some basic 'what do you need' up front," Dante said, after another pause. "No point giving dental dams to gay dudes or fleshlights to lesbians, right?"

[spin_kick_snap]

"Are fleshlights are basic sex supplies?" Kathy asked. Then slanted a grin at him. "And if some dudes have tits, some lesbians may need fleshlights."

Which didn't actually take away from his main point. "I think what I might do is have a checklist when people sign up for the service," she said, making more notes. "It can be adjusted at need, but a basic sheet of what you want, in what quantity, and how often. This way everybody gets what they want when they want it and nobody has to pay for what they don't."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Every time I think you can't make sex nerdier," Dante sighed, sagging back into his seat.

[spin_kick_snap]

"Stand in awe of my other superpower," Kathy said with a solemn nod.

[rebelseekspizza]

"Don't know if 'awe's the right word," Dante said and reached for his drink. "Do you at least get time for product testing?"

[spin_kick_snap]

"I'm going to say I do," Kathy decided. "Especially if I can then, like, write reviews to help influence other shoppers. I'm doing it for the customers."

[rebelseekspizza]

"Totally for no other reason at all," Dante agreed. "Maybe go back for second and third tests too, just to be sure."